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How to Meditate
If you’ve ever been curious about meditating, and you’re wondering how it gets done, we hope this will be of help to you as you embark on that journey. Establish presence, practice mindfulness and embrace gratitude. Whether you choose to sound bath, pray, sauna or hum, put these steps into practice and see how it changes your life.
Are you ever curious about what it means to genuinely meditate? Like, seriously. Maybe you, like most people, have at one point or another mimicked something you saw on television or at the movies, like mindless hmm and hawing or some variation of assorted affirmations and relaxation exercises.
Merriam Webster’s Dictionary defines the term meditate as a verb that means “to engage in contemplation or reflection.” In another entry, they define the term as a verb that means “to engage in mental exercise (such as concentration on one’s breathing or repetition of a mantra) for the purpose of reaching a heightened level of spiritual awareness.”
At the end of the day, meditation is always a practice that is carried out with intention and expectancy. Whether your expectation is to feel more present, fulfilled or well rested, there is always a reason for employing the practice of meditation in one’s life. Today, we’re going to discuss three steps you should take when deciding to meditate.
Step One: Establish presence.
Eckhart Tolle is one of the most well-known spiritual teachers in the world. According to his website, his bestselling books, The Power of Now and A New Earth are published and distributed in 52 different languages – an impressive feat for literally any single person. Moreover, his work has very much been focused on inspiring and empowering people to lead more mindful lives and embrace the advent of being present in each moment of life.
Being present, according to Tolle, is about experiencing the freedom and joys of life. In a popular video of his, he illustrates the importance of being alert, or aware of what is happening around you. He spoke about how our awareness grows and recedes based on the nature of the moment you are living in.
Step Two: Practice mindfulness.
Mindfulness is a hot topic of discussion in today’s social landscape. Possibly because so many of us have misunderstood what it means, or we’ve found ourselves caught up in fringe conspiracies about its place in the aimless musings of abstract thought. Fortunately, psychologists were able to agree.
“Mindfulness is a state of active, open attention to the present. This state is described as observing one’s thoughts and feelings without judging them as good or bad.” (PsychologyToday)
When preparing to meditate, it is important that you understand what it means to be present, and to be aware of and alive in the moment. Some exercises to activate mindfulness include paying attention, living in the moment, focusing on your breathing, and other practical activities recommended by Mayo Clinic, The Harvard Gazette and others.
Step Three: Embrace Gratitude.
Once you’ve established presence, and put mindfulness into practice, there’s only one thing left to do. Embrace gratitude. According to research conducted in the field of positive psychology, “gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness. Gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships.” (Harvard Health)
The embrace and expression of gratitude is linked to a long list of positive outcomes for those who use it in their lives. Stronger immune systems, lower blood pressure, closer relationships and more are all linked to the implementation of gratitude in one’s life. In 2010, Greater Good Magazine actually published a segmented list to review the positive effects of gratitude on the physical, psychological and social levels.
If you’ve ever been curious about meditating, and you’re wondering how it gets done, we hope this will be of help to you as you embark on that journey. Establish presence, practice mindfulness and embrace gratitude. Whether you choose to sound bath, pray, sauna or hum, put these steps into practice and see how it changes your life.
Why sink when you can SWIM?
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How to Get Up Early in the Morning
Here at SEA, we hold the advent of rising early in very high regard. In fact, it’s probably the biggest bias we’ll ever admit to embracing. If we discover any others, we promise to work on them. Until then, take these steps towards building the habit of getting up earlier in the morning and see how it begins to change your life.
Have you ever wondered what it would be like to get up earlier in the morning? Whether you are looking to rise before the sun, or simply add more time or productivity to your day, if at any point you felt seen (or dragged) while reading this post so far, then this is for you.
Something some of our audience may find remarkable in today’s post, is that there is absolutely no major mindblowing recommendation in our advice for how to get up early in the morning. I know that may kill some of the suspense, but no it doesn’t, because we clearly outlined this post with three sections, each titled with what to do to achieve the “how to” item mentioned in the title. Anyway, now that that’s out of the way, let’s dive into three important things you should do if you would like to start getting up earlier in the morning.
Step One: Make a plan.
Before we dive into your first step towards getting up earlier in the morning, let’s take a moment to remember an important note of wisdom, bestowed on us by the late Mr. Benjamin Franklin.
“By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.” ― Benjamin Franklin
Ben knew, perhaps from experience, that success should never be expected from the person who has not prepared to make it happen. So for all our achievers visiting this post today, it’s time to take out your pen and paper and think about what you can do to build the habit of getting up earlier in the morning moving forward. Here are some tips on things you may want to consider:
Go to sleep earlier in the night (different from going to bed… right?)
Disconnect from electronic devices at least one hour before bed
Blackout the entire room before bed time
Adjust the alarm to an earlier time
Note the time you’re getting up!!
This list may look a lot different, depending on who you are and how you normally spend your time. Maybe it will include leaving the party or the dinner with friends earlier, and sometimes it may look like not going at all. A strong recommendation to build desire towards getting up the next day is to write down what you will do in the morning that you are genuinely looking forward to. This is an exercise that can help excite and prepare you mentally and emotionally, so the physical advent of getting up can be made easier when it is time.
Step Two: Go to sleep on time.
Reminder – going to bed and going to sleep are two very different things. Can I get an amen? Lol, we don’t need to go into the details of why they are two different things for you (or for me) – let’s just accept that this is true, and vow to make sure we will be getting to sleep on time from now on. Also, as I mentioned earlier, there may be some night time sacrifices made in order to achieve your goal of getting up earlier in the morning.
It may sound tough right now, but please trust that the tub of ice cream will be in the freezer in the morning. The new album from your favourite artist that drops in the middle of the night will still be there in the morning. Your friends will still love you even if you can’t stay out late every single night of the week for dinner, drinks, dessert and debauchery.
Get to sleep on time. Zero excuses. You are the architect of the life you lead. No seriously…
“You are the architect of your own future, so design your future with uncompromising sincerity.” ― Debasish Mridha
Step Three: Get up on time. Regardless of how you feel.
Remember when you were making a plan to start getting up earlier in the mornings? What was the time you wrote down? Not the time you had in mind, or the time that your girlfriend says she gets up in the morning. What was the time you wrote down?
That’s the time you need to get up.
Zero excuses.
If you know, or suspect, you may need to wake up a few minutes earlier in order to muster the strength and willpower to pull yourself up out of the bed on time, plan accordingly. Getting up in the morning is no one’s responsibility but your own. If you made it this far into the post, then it’s because you believe getting up earlier is something you ought to try. Well, congratulations! You’ve just hit the jackpot on how to get it done.
Here at SEA, we hold the advent of rising early in very high regard. In fact, it’s probably the biggest bias we’ll ever admit to embracing. If we discover any others, we promise to work on them. Until then, take these steps towards building the habit of getting up earlier in the morning and see how it begins to change your life.
Why sink when you can SWIM?
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A Mindful Daily Routine With Ashley Graham
In a recent article, published to The Wall Street Journal, Ashley opens up about how she prioritises her time, and sheds light on her daily routine. Here are three things that stuck out to us, and why we ought to consider establishing these practices in our own lives.
The model, icon and activist channels mindfulness in these three ways.
Ashley Graham is an icon in her own right. She is a woman of many firsts, including the first curvy or plus-sized model to grace the cover of Sports Illustrated Magazine (2016) as well as Vogue Magazine (2017), although (mindfully) she is not a fan of the term “plus-sized”, a stance she has expounded on in her 2015 TEDx Talk at TEDxBerkleeValencia.
In a recent article, published to The Wall Street Journal, Ashley opens up about how she prioritises her time, and sheds light on her daily routine. Here are three things that stuck out to us, and why we ought to consider establishing these practices in our own lives.
Getting Up Early in the Morning
As a mother of three children, Ashley notes that it is important to her that she be up ahead of them to ensure enough space for her to have some alone time before their day begins. Early in this case is approximately 06:30a or 06:45a depending on the day. For others it could be the same, or a bit earlier or later depending on the person.
Getting up early is an important thing to consider. Studies have long demonstrated a link between getting up early and increased productivity or overall wellness, although each case is different per person. For more information on why you should consider getting up earlier in the morning, check out this article published to Healthline, listing ten benefits observed in the adoption of an early riser’s lifestyle.
Taking Vitamins
Mindful of all that her body has gone through in its 32 year journey on this planet, Ashley shares that she is in fact a vitamin consumer. She mentions that she is actually currently working with a naturopath to “regulate literally everything” going on in her body.
The Council for Responsible Nutrition reports as recently as 2019 that nearly 80% of all adults in the United States are using vitamins or dietary supplements. In the same year, the American Osteopathic Association reported an even higher number, however, they made note that out of all the people taking vitamin supplements, “only 21% have a confirmed nutritional deficiency.”
Most people, confirmed nutritional deficiency or not, do not have the means to hire a doctor specifically for the compilation of vitamin supplements, let alone visiting a doctor outside of their primary care physician. So for all our multivitamin consumers out there, Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health’s The Nutrition Journal published an article that lists out some things you should consider before taking vitamin supplements regularly. Here’s a brief look at what they recommended:
“Reasons to use a multivitamin:
I am eating a limited diet or my appetite is poor so that I am eating less than usual.
I am following a restricted diet for longer than one week. This could be prescribed such as a liquid diet after a surgical procedure, or a self-imposed diet such as on with the goal of weight loss.
I have a condition that reduces my body’s ability to absorb nutrients (celiac disease, ulcerative colitis) or have undergone surgery that interferes with the normal absorption of nutrients (gastric bypass surgery, Whipple procedure).
I temporarily have increased nutrient needs, such as being pregnant.
I’m very busy and just can’t eat a balanced diet every day.
Reasons that may not need a multivitamin:
I eat well but am feeling tired all the time (discuss first with your doctor so they can investigate other possible causes).
I eat a pretty good diet but want to improve my health as much as possible, so it couldn’t hurt to get some extra nutrition from a vitamin.
I have osteoporosis and need more calcium, or I have iron-deficiency anemia and need more iron (in both scenarios, you may only need to take those individual nutrients rather than a comprehensive multivitamin).”
Of course, at the end of the day, what you choose to invest is between you and your doctor.
Utilising Meditation and Prayer
Another note Ashley touched on in her discourse with Lane Florsheim, the author of the article published to The Wall Street Journal, was one of meditation and prayer.
“Usually in the mornings, that will be my time for a true meditation prayer. Justin (her husband) and I have been doing it together for years, and we started inviting Isaac into prayer time, and he loves it. Alone time, which is just as important for me, is really when the children go down. Justin and I have a thing where we just know that in order to be better for each other, we also need to have our own time and our own space.”
The impact of meditation and prayer on our mental, emotional and physical health has been studied for years, with varying results. The National Center for Complementary and Integrative Health says “much of the research on these topics has been preliminary or not scientifically rigorous. Because the studies examined many different types of meditation and mindfulness practices, and the effects of those practices are hard to measure, results from the studies have been difficult to analyze and may have been interpreted too optimistically.” Adversely, this article published to the Emory News Center at Emory University notes the benefits observed by a practising psychologist in Sri Lanka following the tsunami of 2004.
Although conclusive research on meditation and prayer is still minimal, the testimonies of those who already use these methods for mindfulness and wellness may make the consideration worthwhile.
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How to End A Relationship, Respectfully
A lot of people get stuck reminiscing on past memories shared with people who are no longer a part of their lives, and if they’re not careful, they begin to dwell in that space, abandoning their present and future potential by focusing on something that they had once resolved to leave behind. If you are in a situation right now where you feel it necessary to end a relationship (or two, or six, or nine), take this advice. Don’t go another day wondering why things never work out.
Are you in an unhealthy relationship with someone you love and respect, but you just don’t know how to get out of it? Are you in a relationship with someone you feel you have lost respect for, but you’re still unsure of the best way to discontinue your relationship? If you’re in any variation of these tricky situations, and you are hoping to move forward without the tumult of the relationship you are currently in, then this post is for you.
Check in with yourself.
Being in a relationship, whether it be romantic or platonic, professional or familial can be really challenging for a number of reasons. One of the more challenging aspects of relationships we find ourselves really involved in is that sometimes, if we’re not careful, we begin to think a bit too much from the perspective of the other person and a bit too little from the perspective of our authentic selves.
In good times and bad times, in all life’s ups and downs, the most important voice you will ever listen to is your own. It is incredibly important that you are in tune with your truest self and the reality of your interests and desires. This is how we show up authentically in our relationships with others. So, when things have gone awry in any relationship in your life, take a moment to check in with yourself?
“Have I been honest about who I am and what I desire?”
“Have I been consistent? Are there any mixed messages I may have been sending as of late?”
“What am I really feeling in this relationship right now, and what do I want moving forward?”
“Am I willing to move forward with this person, and to what extent or cost?”
These are some example questions you may need to ask yourself when dealing with a relationship that feels broken, especially one that feels broken beyond the hope of repair because let’s face – if you’ve come to this post, then you probably already know what it’s like to be in one of these situations.
Check in with the other person.
A really important next step when dealing with the desire to end a relationship is checking in with the other person. Now, it is not always necessary to check in with a person to discuss the end of a relationship. Here’s why. Regardless of what social media or Lifetime TV may have told you, you don’t inherently owe anyone anything, and no one in this life inherently owes you anything. Period.
Some relationships require some discussion in order for you to clear a path forward for yourself that successfully avoids unnecessary tolls on your mental and emotional health, however, this is not always the case. It is important for you to be able to discern the difference.
If you are able, and the other person is willing, create a safe space for the two of you to engage in a discussion about the problems each of you are facing within the context of your relationship. If you are open to rekindling what the two of you once shared, go ahead and make that clear. However, if you are unwilling to move forward with this person, go ahead and make that clear during your discussion when it is most appropriate.
Safe spaces are paramount to the success of tough conversations. Before you dive into the issues of how this person’s words and actions have left you to feel, and before they dive into the illustration of how your behaviour has impacted them, be sure to make it very clear that you are both committing to holding a safe space for the other person to express themselves with uninterrupted authenticity.
Now, if you feel like a conversation about the potential end of your relationship with someone in your life will require more than you can afford to give of your mental health, go ahead and exit stage left—let the relationship go without the conversation. Even if you are feeling unsure, it is always better to move forward than to remain still in one place for too long a time. It is also better to end the relationship without the conversation than to have the conversation without the procurement of a safe space.
Ghosting does not have the best reputation socially, however, we do it a lot more than we care to admit, and sometimes we don’t do it when it actually needs to be done. Sure, it is nice to feel a sense of closure from one chapter of our lives that helps us turn the page to what’s next, however, if you are unable to endure the process of what the journey to that closure might look like right now, you need to do what is best for you. Even if it feels selfish, do what needs to be done. You cannot help someone if you are unwilling to help yourself.
Move on with your life.
Once you have resolved to end a relationship, you need to move on. There is more life to be lived – go out and live it! What dreams are you chasing? What new realities do you have the power to create? Your future is literally in the palm of your hands –don’t waste it fixating on what used to be.
This is a really important part of ending a relationship. A lot of people get stuck reminiscing on past memories shared with people who are no longer a part of their lives, and if they’re not careful, they begin to dwell in that space, abandoning their present and future potential by focusing on something that they had once resolved to leave behind.
If you are in a situation right now where you feel it necessary to end a relationship (or two, or six, or nine), take this advice. Don’t go another day wondering why things never work out. Take ownership of your decision to stay or go, and take action in direction of the desires of your heart.
Why sink when you can SWIM?
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How to Embrace Your Family’s Culture
If you have been wanting to build more closeness and understanding with your family, such that you might be able to effectively embrace or identify with their culture, consider these steps and see where they take you. After all why sink when you can SWIM?
Have you ever wanted to connect more with your family’s culture? Ever felt like maybe there was something more you could do to show your interest in understanding your family members and your family history? This may not be the tell-all or the “ultimate guide” on how to embrace your family structure, however, we felt these three nuggets might be most useful for our readers who are looking to identify more with their family’s culture and heritage.
Ask questions
One of the quickest routes to the answers of life is always going to be found in the asking of a question. “How was your day?” “Do you like our new beverage?” “What’s the weather like outside?” The same principle applies when it comes to getting to know your family.
Asking questions is an important step in learning how to embrace your family’s culture because it provides the foundation for understanding to be built. These questions can range in depth and severity depending on who you are speaking with and what your objectives are. Remember to always exercise patience and gratitude when asking questions about a family member or a family story – as close as you may be in each others hearts, you never know what triggers you may be tripping in your discussions with the ones you love.
Here is a short list of some questions you might ask to better understand your family’s culture, heritage or traditions:
What country are you from?
What is your native language?
What was your relationship with your mother like while growing up?
What was a normal day for you during your primary school years?
What was home life like for you and your family growing up?
What are some of your favourite family traditions and why?
Did you have any dreams about your future when you were little?
How did your family respond to or support your dreams as a child?
What are your favourite memories of your family?
Were there any special family traditions?
Do you have any special family dishes I should know about?
What’s one difficult situation you faced with your family, and how did you handle it?
What is one difficult family memory you have, and how do you navigate those feelings?
Participate in family traditions
If the first step to embracing your family’s culture is to ask questions and build understanding, then the next step that would make the most sense is to get involved and be an active participant in family activities. It’s time to participate in your family’s traditions.
Now, depending on your family’s background and the current interests of the leading members of your family, your traditions might look a little different than others… or a lot. It all depends.
Maybe it’s Sunday night football, Taco Tuesday or Wednesday night Bible study. Maybe it’s digital distancing on Fridays and Saturdays, or dinner at Auntie’s on Thursday nights. Maybe it’s celebrating the High Holy Days, going to church or fashion week. Whatever your family’s traditions are, participating in one or more will help you in embracing your family’s culture, and may actually bring your family closer together.
Here is a short list of some common family traditions:
Sitting down for a meal together
Saying a prayer together regularly
Singing, dancing or performing together
Reading together as a family
Family story time
Family movie night
Family game night
Annual family vacation
Weekly family mental health check in
Family group hugs and handshakes
Family hiking, fishing, or other outdoors adventure
Attend family gatherings
Whether the gathering itself be common or uncommon, take the time to be present with your family when the opportunity arises. This is the most organic way to build closeness, to understand and embrace the culture of your family, and to even help perpetuate it.
If you’re in your hometown, perhaps coordinate with family members to have a dinner or a special family outing. Visit someone’s house, or go support a loved one at something special they have going on. Take the time to get to know your loved ones – after all, culture is really driven by who we are.
So there you have it. If you have been wanting to build more closeness and understanding with your family, such that you might be able to effectively embrace or identify with their culture, consider these steps and see where they take you.
Why sink when you can SWIM?
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During this course, students will reflect on the reality of their past, present and future identities, and the significance of interpersonal relationships and habitual practices to build self-confidence and determination.